My sweet Sarah has ten perfect toes. Her right hand has five perfect fingers. On the other hand, she has one perfect thumb, an index finger and a pinky finger that are just as perfect but different, and no middle finger or ring finger.
My philosophy on parentage is the same as my philosophy in life…do the best that you can and have a positive attitude. In raising Sarah, Ron and I intend to do the best that we can to make sure she grows up happy, healthy and whole. We realize that her childhood will be different from that of the baby born a few days before Sarah to Ron’s classmate and different from that of her close in age cousins Glennis and Octavia. This realization does not mean Sarah will be any less happy or any less capable or any less loved.
Giving birth was overwhelming to say the least. I think I realized I would survive. In any case, I realized there was “the other side.” Relief. An end to the pain. “I don’t ever have to do this again!” I exclaimed. So when the doctor told me that Sarah didn’t have all her fingers, I was in a “kiss the ground” state of mind and all I needed to know was “is she ok?” Anyone who has gotten to know me well over the last few years knows that health is something that I find great interest in and am passionate about. For me not to have more questions for the doctor that brought my baby into the world or the pediatrician that visited us the next day, lets you know that I had really been through! The pediatrician told us that what had happened to Sarah’s left hand did not appear genetic and that it may be the result of some kind of uterine band.
If you know anything about my husband, you know he will look up any and everything. If he doesn’t know something, he just hasn’t had the opportunity to look it up yet. This is a great website that he found. http://www.ontheotherhand.org/index.html. It offers insight and understanding to what may have happened to Sarah in utero and what she may face in the future.
All the while, Sarah uses both of her hands. She grabs things, sucks her fingers, holds her hands together, scratches her cute little face, etc. We have little concern about why and will concentrate on what we can do and how to make things the best they can be for Sarah. We are not in any way ashamed of Sarah’s hand. It is not the result of anything we did or Sarah did. There is absolutely nothing wrong with her. To us, it’s just another one of life’s challenges if that even. God blessed us with Sarah and chose us to be her parents for a reason. We will do our best to make sure Sarah has all the love and support she needs to be happy, healthy and whole.
As Oprah likes to ask, “what do you know for sure?” I know for sure that we will do everything we can to allow Sarah to have a good life and we will seek help where we fall short. I know for sure that I could not love “Sarah Beara” more. In my heart, our love for her is just as perfect as she is. On the other hand, I know for sure that Sarah will have the most protective mother on the east coast. (I thought “in the whole world” would be less believable.)
